Monday 8 June 2015

Writing Portfolio Sample

Description: My writing goal is to use a range of different sentences. One of them is complex sentences. I am gonna try get better at this goal by using a range of different sentences and try combining them together. In Troy's writing class, we watched a movie about a mouse trying to get adopted. We had to retell the story in our own way and try to add complex sentences in the story.  Here is the movie we watched. It is called "Mouse For Sale":



Big Idea:  Here is my story. The complex sentences are highlighted red. If you don't know what a complex sentence is, here is a brief explanation. A complex sentence is a sentence where it has two clauses. One of the clauses is an independent clause (which means it can stand alone) and the other is a dependent clause. For example: Because my coffee was too cold, I had to heat it in the microwave. The underlined part is the independent clause. The dependent clause can't stand alone so it is added to a independent clause.

Here is my writing. Hope you enjoy!:




Feedback/feedforward:
Great Job Aye, I really like your writing! I love all the complex sentences that you have used. They make your writing much more interesting! Next time I think that you could make smaller paragraphs because they are sometimes a little big! Great Job! Hannah K 

Evaluation: 
I honestly think that I have developed an understanding of complex sentences. Before, I had never heard of a phrase like "complex sentences". I think I might need to work on using different types of sentences like: " Compound, simple, compound- complex etc" I'll work towards this goal by thinking more about how they work and which way will imporve my sentence. - Aye



1 comment:

  1. Aye, what a sensational piece of writing you have done. Reading narratives like this makes teachers days. I'm finding it hard to fault your writing and this is the same quality of those in a published book. My only criticism is picked up by Hannah, your paragraphing. Authors use paragraphs to switch scenes and create anticipation and suspense. I'm sure you have observed this in the many books you read. Think about how you could bring those skills into your own writing.

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